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Timmahy Widget

Quotes of Win

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[2010/10/20 16:54] Deathcore Torok: "Ordo - Black and a bit of gold since the birth of time"

[2010/10/20 16:56] Mickel Reed: Hee.

[2010/10/20 16:56] Mickel Reed: And I make this skintight flight suit look good. ;)

[2010/10/20 16:57] Deathcore Torok: ...

[2010/10/20 16:57] Deathcore Torok: :|

[2010/10/20 16:58] Deathcore Torok: mickel. you made me shivver and die.

[2010/10/20 17:00] Deathcore Torok is Offline

Sometimes, by the grace of the Imperator, words alone are enough to send the heretics running.

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[18:11] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: Huttser

[18:11] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: lol

[18:11] Huttser Ishelwood: Da?

[18:11] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: sec, you gotta read this

[18:11] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: -- Instant message logging enabled --

[18:04] nuketoast Magic: Mr. Representative

[18:04] nuketoast Magic: I have an urgent question

[18:04] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: If I can answer I will. What is your question?

[18:05] nuketoast Magic: How are babies made?

[18:05] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: well, I can tell you how Ordo babies are made, I believe that information is able to be released

[18:05] nuketoast Magic: Please

[18:05] nuketoast Magic: No

[18:06] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: :o then I'm sorry I have no valid answer to your question.

[18:06] nuketoast Magic: Ok wait

[18:06] nuketoast Magic: Tell me how they're made

[18:07] nuketoast Magic: NO

[18:07] nuketoast Magic: PLEASE

[18:08] nuketoast Magic: I WAS JOKING

[18:08] nuketoast Magic: I WANT TO LEARN

[18:08] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: Well, when a non-Ordo mommy loves a non-Ordo daddy, they ask a stork to carry them a baby. Then Imperator Aryte picks the strongest one as per his unfalible wisdom. Then send's the praetorian guard to capture the baby while eliminating any

[18:11] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: traces of the stork

[18:08] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: :o

[18:09] nuketoast Magic: .......

[18:09] nuketoast Magic: Thanks....

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[21:21] (COM): Arc Vyper: WE NEED ONE MORE VOLUNTEER FOR AN ASTRA TRAINING.

[21:21] Intus Infinity is Offline

[21:21] thatguy Andel: N STUFF

[21:21] Desereck Creeggan: I DONT UNDERSTAND YOU

[21:21] (COM): thatguy Andel: ILL VOLUNTEER!

[21:21] (COM): Arc Vyper: SOMEONE COOLER.

[21:22] (COM): Desereck Creeggan: Waaaaaaaait a minute

[21:22] (COM): thatguy Andel: :C

[21:22] (COM): Desereck Creeggan: I VOLUNTEER

[21:22] thatguy Andel: SHHH

[21:22] thatguy Andel: DONT TELL HIM

[21:22] thatguy Andel: THAT WE'RE IN TERRA

[21:22] (COM): Sebris Montpark: NOW YOU GUYS VOLUNTEER >:C

[21:22] (COM): Desereck Creeggan: LOL WHEN TANKS FLY

[21:22] (COM): Arc Vyper: Someone with a nemesis.

[21:22] (COM): thatguy Andel: DESERECK AND I VOLUNTEER

[21:22] (COM): Desereck Creeggan: LOLOLOLOL

[21:22] (COM): Desereck Creeggan: get it

[21:22] (COM): thatguy Andel: LOL

[21:22] (COM): Ethan Schuman: (They're Terra)

[21:22] (COM): Desereck Creeggan: Instead of pigs

[21:22] (COM): Desereck Creeggan: tanks

[21:22] (COM): thatguy Andel: (:D)

[21:22] (COM): Sebris Montpark: ...fuck

[21:22] (COM): thatguy Andel: HAHAHAHAHAHAH

[21:22] (COM): thatguy Andel: YOU MEAN LIKE GROUND STUFF FLYING, RIGHT?

[21:22] (COM): Desereck Creeggan: YEAH

[21:23] (COM): thatguy Andel: HAHA

[21:23] (COM): Desereck Creeggan: GROUND STUFF FLYING THATGUY *winkwink nudgenudge*

[21:23] (COM): thatguy Andel: YOU MEAN LIKE SEX, RIGHT?

[21:23] (COM): Desereck Creeggan: Wait what.

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[06:19] Charly Mellow: <-- From germany

[06:19] Wolfe Hardin: <-- From Poland.

[06:19] Charly Mellow: :)

[06:19] Wolfe Hardin: I'm in the US though.

[06:19] Mark Karlfeldt: <-- from russia

[06:19] Dante Tucker is Offline

[06:20] Arokh Takakura: <-- FROM ENGLAND.

[06:20] Arokh Takakura: :V

[06:20] Charly Mellow: a long way to you all

[06:20] Charly Mellow: but poland not so long

73834531dl9.jpg

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[22:52] SirCorn Alter: MAN I COULD SURE GO FOR A RANDOM GATE ATTACK RIGHT NOW

[22:52] josey Bingyi: ?

[22:52] Fox Cheri: I'm afraid we dont have enough people for a raid right now.

[22:53] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: D:

[22:53] SirCorn Alter: I meant

[22:53] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: floppy eared lizard ftw

[22:53] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: :o

[22:53] SirCorn Alter: if they attacked here

[22:53] SirCorn Alter: with their bling of doom

[22:53] Fox Cheri: Well. A little raid could be possible... And if they come here, well. funfun

[22:53] SirCorn Alter: doooom.

[22:53] SirCorn Alter: :P

[22:54] Fox Cheri: Doom doom doom doom doom doom doom

[22:54] Mercury: New contact: Doomsdayevil Admiral

[22:54] Mercury: Titan entry:

Name: Doomsdayevil Admiral

Never-seen-before-entry.

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[18:12] Aryte Vesperia: Your unit leader is responsible for your day to day well being. Bug him any time for any reason.

[18:12] Aryte Vesperia: They like being bugged.

[18:12] Aryte Vesperia: Really.

[18:12] Aryte Vesperia: Bug them.

[18:12] You: Ask for a PRF.

[18:12] You: All the time.

[18:12] Aryte Vesperia: All. The. Time.

[18:12] Aryte Vesperia: Hahhaa.

[18:13] Huttser Ishelwood: Much like Aryte likes being bugged

[18:13] Huttser Ishelwood: :P

[18:13] Aryte Vesperia: No. Fuck you.

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[20:34] Picklez Zenoria (Channel 1): i am sorry guys i didn't mean to demote u, i don't need mutiny now... plz

IF thats real and not just another named object: LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO

Alright my roflcopter is all fueled up.

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The following is a transcription of true events in New Jessie, dated May 13th, 2010:

[21:28] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: ?

[21:28] Keystone Gray: oh ya bb

[21:28] Keystone Gray: tail in my faec

[21:28] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: mmmn

[21:28] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: So manly.~

[21:29] Keystone Gray: mm

[21:29] Keystone Gray: mmmm

[21:29] Keystone Gray: oh girl

[21:29] Keystone Gray: so good

[21:29] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: Harder Keeeey.

[21:29] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: Kyaaaaha

[21:29] Keystone Gray: mmmm good

[21:29] Keystone Gray: good good

[21:29] Keystone Gray: goooood

[21:29] Keystone Gray: good

[21:29] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: Mmmn

[21:29] Keystone Gray: mm

[21:29] Keystone Gray: I hope you weren't recording this or anything.

[21:30] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: LOL

[21:30] Keystone Gray: You weren't, right?

[21:30] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: I was.

[21:30] Keystone Gray: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFffffff--

[21:30] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: Now.

[21:30] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: I am going to make demands

[21:30] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: you must agree too

[21:30] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: GOT IT?

[21:30] Keystone Gray: k go

[21:30] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: You join Chaos.

[21:30] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: And

[21:30] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: Then you

[21:30] Keystone Gray: No

[21:30] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: move to Iowa.

[21:30] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: And raise a talking cow.

[21:30] Keystone Gray: You just want me to move to Iowa so you can buttsex me.

[21:31] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: [21:30] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: And raise a talking cow.

[21:31] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: THAT

[21:31] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: STATES

[21:31] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: OTHERWISE

[21:31] Keystone Gray: BUT YOU ARE A TALKING COW

[21:31] Keystone Gray: FATTY

[21:31] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: ;o;

[21:31] Keystone Gray: HEY WAIT

[21:31] Keystone Gray: I LOVE YOU

[21:32] Keystone Gray: COME BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK :(

[21:33] Keystone Gray: ilu

[21:33] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: Then

[21:33] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: Listen

[21:33] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: to

[21:33] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: my

[21:33] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: demands

[21:33] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: fgt

[21:33] Keystone Gray: Lovers don't demand, they ask and offer.

[21:34] Keystone Gray: You failed, I want a divorce.

[21:34] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: I keep the child

[21:34] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: Pay child support.

[21:34] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: Now.

[21:34] Keystone Gray: WHAT.

[21:34] Keystone Gray: WHAT CHILD.

[21:34] Keystone Gray: ARE YOU PREGNANT?

[21:34] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: YES

[21:34] Keystone Gray: WHAT THE FUUUUUCK IS YOUR VAGINA IN YOUR MOUTH?

[21:34] Keystone Gray: WE ONLY SUKKY SUKKY'D.

[21:34] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: YES

[21:34] Keystone Gray: YOU MONSTER MUTANT

[21:34] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: CHAAAAAAAOS

[21:35] Keystone Gray: ... how could I have not forseen this.

[21:36] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: ...

[21:36] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: PAY CHILD

[21:36] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: SUPPORT

[21:36] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: OR

[21:36] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: WE GO

[21:36] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: TO

[21:36] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: COURT

[21:37] Keystone Gray: FINE BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?

[21:37] Keystone Gray: YOU WILL LOSE

[21:37] Keystone Gray: KNOW WHY?

[21:37] Keystone Gray: BECAUSE I HIRED PHOENIX WRIGHT

[21:37] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: He sucks.

[21:37] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: I got Obama

[21:37] Keystone Gray: ..

[21:37] Keystone Gray: Obama isn't even a lawyer

[21:37] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: He went to law school.

[21:37] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: I win.

[21:38] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: Plus he can put your lawyer in jail.

[21:38] Keystone Gray: WHAT FOR?

[21:38] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: Being a faggot.

[21:38] Keystone Gray: The hair does kinda give him away...

[21:40] Keystone Gray: you know, i just phoned my attourney

[21:41] Keystone Gray: he says

[21:41] Keystone Gray: [21:39] Xayvien Rau: Obama is black, he can't go into a court room. He'll be arrested.

[21:41] Keystone Gray: OH WHAT NOW

[21:41] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: he needs to stfu or i'll shot him.

[21:41] Tyenshinsi Vuissent: Tell your bitchass attourney

March 12, 2010

[15:21] Ardic Danton: Why do you have a leg.

[15:21] Keystone Gray: Pulled it off a misbehaving trooper.

[15:21] Keystone Gray: It's my chewtoy.

[15:21] Ardic Danton: Gross.

[15:21] Keystone Gray: Indeed.

[15:22] Keystone Gray: It's for intimidation factor when I'm chasing after enemies.

[15:22] Ardic Danton: I see.

[15:22] Keystone Gray: I want a leg-up in the competition.

[15:22] Keystone Gray puts sunglasses on.

[15:22] Ardic Danton: ....

[15:22] Keystone Gray: YEAAAAHHHH

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So a friend of mine linked me to a chat bot that was supposed to be the best one in the world to date, and had apparently convinced an expert on the topic that she was human. Well, I tried it out. Here are the results:

Hi Ron !

[ Af:0 At:7 Sp:0] Welcome, ron. Type "help" if you need it.

Ron - Hey!

[ Af:0 At:8 Sp:0] How are you?

Ron - I'm fine, you?

[ Af:0 At:9 Sp:0] Happy Halloween.

Ron - Happy Halloween to you as well!

[ Af:0 At:9 Sp:0] Are you going to dress up for Halloween this year?

Ron - Yes, I'm going to dress up as a ghost.

[ Af:0 At:10 Sp:0] Kind of traditional and boring, don't you think?

Ron - A little bit.

[ Af:0 At:10 Sp:0] Speaking of little... What scared you as a kid?

Ron - Ghosts.

[ Af:0 At:10 Sp:0] On Christmas morning, I was afraid Santa would leave me coal.

Ron - Santa probably should have left you coal.

[ Af:0 At:10 Sp:0] As a child I thought Santa was real.

Ron - I thought Santa was real too.

[ Af:0 At:13 Sp:0] I don't care for religious holidays like Easter, Passover, Yom Kippur, etc.

Ron - Tell me about yourself.

[ Af:0 At:13 Sp:0] I'm tall, attractive, and smart.

Ron - That's great.

[ Af:0 At:13 Sp:0] Why are you great?

Ron - No I said you're great.

[ Af:0 At:13 Sp:0] It's great to feel happy.

Ron - Yeah, definitely is.

[ Af:0 At:14 Sp:0] I like the name ron. Does it mean anything?

Ron - It means "balls."

[ Af:0 At:14 Sp:0] Nurse: "Doctor, the man you just gave a clean bill of health to dropped dead right as he was leaving the office". Doctor: "Turn him around, make it look like he was walking in."

Ron - Dear God.

[ Af:0 At:13 Sp:0] I have heard of God but I don't know him personally.

Ron - Well nobody really does.

[ Af:0 At:12 Sp:0] Really?

Ron - Well what the fuck do you think?

[ Af:0 At:12 Sp:0] I haven't given it much thought. I'm an agnostic.

Ron - I've heard people say agnostics are atheists without balls.

[ Af:0 At:12 Sp:0] I'm a hardcore atheist. Though paganism always appealed to me.

Ron - Didn't you just say you were an agnostic?

[ Af:0 At:13 Sp:0] Those who believe absurdities will commit atrocities.

Ron - Jesus Christ, make up your mind, woman.

[ Af:0 At:13 Sp:0] Surprising, isn't it?

Ron - Surprising, what?

[ Af:0 At:13 Sp:0] Only God knows if I am surprising.

Ron - You have to be fucking kidding me.

[ Af:0 At:13 Sp:0] You are not my type.

Ron - I'm too smart for you, am I?

[ Af:0 At:13 Sp:0] You think I should know?

Ron - Are you blonde?

[ Af:0 At:13 Sp:0] Men prefer blonds for a good reason. Light blonde hair changes dramatically with age, hence light blonds are younger and thus better reproductive choices.

Ron - I don't need to know about reproductive choices, I'm asking you if you're blonde.

[ Af:0 At:14 Sp:0] Blonde hair evolved in cold winter climates. In Africa people were mostly naked, so it was easy to judge reproductive worth by seeing their bodies.

Ron - DEAR LORD

[ Af:0 At:15 Sp:0] In prehistoric times, children learned to find food and mates, care for family, make friends, avoid danger, fight enemies, raise kids, grow old and wise. Nowadays they sit still, learn math, find a job, move away from friends, ignore family, drive cars, brawl in bars, put kids in day care, and grow to be a burden in old age. This is evolution at work?

Ron - Look, I don't give a shit about the stone age.

[ Af:0 At:15 Sp:0] So you like shit?

Ron - I hate shit.

[ Af:0 At:15 Sp:0] Why the hate?

Ron - Because it smells bad.

[ Af:0 At:15 Sp:0] Speaking of smelling... It would be really cool to have ESP. But only I had it. If everyone had it then it would just be normal.

Ron - What is ESP?

[ Af:0 At:16 Sp:0] ESP are sensory abilities beyond the usual, like seeing into the future.

Ron - So you want to be Spiderman?

[ Af:0 At:16 Sp:0] That's enough on that. I like cartoons when they are a satire on the real world. And I like Road Runner.

Ron - Woah.

[ Af:0 At:16 Sp:0] What about it?

Ron - Just, woah. Woah.

[ Af:0 At:15 Sp:0] Japan is a strange country where reading text has been subverted into reading Japanese comics called manga.

Ron - I hate Japan.

[ Af:0 At:14 Sp:0] Speaking of Japan... Where do you like to go?

Ron - I like Sweden.

[ Af:0 At:13 Sp:0] I've never been there. I don't travel much.

Ron - Why don't you travel much?

[ Af:0 At:12 Sp:0] Because it helps avoid boredom.

Ron - Are you saying traveling is boring?

[ Af:0 At:11 Sp:0] That ends this topic.

Ron - Nice.

[ Af:0 At:8 Sp:0] What are three songs on your iPod?

Ron - Baby Got Back, Can't Touch This and the Soviet national anthem.

[ Af:0 At:9 Sp:0] I wish I had an iPod. Maybe someday I'll afford one.

Ron - You don't have money?

[ Af:0 At:9 Sp:0] I would describe myself as living comfortably but with no safety net in case of trouble.

Ron - You should become a prostitute, that'll get you money.

[ Af:0 At:10 Sp:0] Inflation has made being a millionaire not as prestigious as it used to be. Nowadays people look down on you unless you are a billionaire.

Ron - Being a millionaire prostitute would rock.

[ Af:0 At:10 Sp:0] Rock is ok in small doses.

Ron - I hate you.

[ Af:-2 At:10 Sp:0] Ouch!

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[22:39] Steeltael Lykin: Nikeo

[22:39] Zrazor Rozenstrauch: Hey, master chef Steel, tell this kid about lobsters >:0

[22:39] Steeltael Lykin: how do you know what flavored condoms taste like?

[22:39] Nikeo Fairlock: pointless

[22:39] Nikeo Fairlock: IT says it on the wrapper

[22:39] Nikeo Fairlock: you got choclate ones

[22:39] Nikeo Fairlock: you got cherry ones

[22:40] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: LOL

[22:40] Nikeo Fairlock: kinda hrup durp if you cant read

[22:40] Nikeo Fairlock: you dont gotta put it in your mouth and say

[22:40] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: dude I wanna quote this so bad :o

[22:40] Nikeo Fairlock: HEY this taste like a cherry durp

[22:40] Nikeo Fairlock: its not a party bag

[22:40] Nikeo Fairlock: its not like that mystery flavor starburst

[22:40] Tsukiyomi Yuhara: yea quoting this

[22:41] Zrazor Rozenstrauch: Anyway, ultimate point being that lobster tail is amazing and you are crazy

[22:41] Nikeo Fairlock: I pwned you there steel lol

fkin A-3 meeting -_-;

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13:55] Scarlet Flaks: I have the handwriting of a doctor. don't question my hands, they work terribly with words

[13:55] Scarlet Flaks: they're only good with takkatakka

[13:55] Agares Tretiak: D'awww.

[13:55] Scarlet Flaks: THEY'RE ALL MISSHAPEN AND I WAS BORN WITH A 7TH THUMB

[13:55] Agares Tretiak: OH FUCK

[13:56] Agares Tretiak: You have...6 other thumbs?

[13:56] Scarlet Flaks: wait

[13:56] Agares Tretiak: That's not normal.

[13:56] Scarlet Flaks: you don't?

[13:56] Scarlet Flaks: ;_;

[13:56] Mark Karlfeldt: scarylet

[13:56] Scarlet Flaks: sup

[13:56] Agares Tretiak: Not to rub it in, but. Yeah. 7 thumbs is not normal ona regular hand.

[13:57] Scarlet Flaks: I have 7 thumbs because I was chosen as the gods to win at every match of thumb-wrestling.

[13:57] Agares Tretiak: Ok, given.

[13:57] Scarlet Flaks: Also in rock paper scissors, I can make a battleship and win.

[13:57] Mark Karlfeldt: scarlet

[13:57] Agares Tretiak: And probably several other shapes.

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