More crazy Zrazor essays

[RazorFox]

"What do you believe is the greatest single threat to your health, safety, and academic performance? Why?"

The nature of the first portion of this set of questions is purely subjective in nature, in that it asks what I believe is the single greatest threat to my health, safety, and academic performance. Ergo, there is no wrong answer to this question, lest I be dishonest about what I believe. In truth, I feel that the single greatest threat to my health, safety, and academic performance is the Space Nazis. In 1945, Hitler committed suicide to avoid capture by the Russians. Certain members of Nazi High Command fled the planet earth to reside within the confines of a secret Nazi moon base, where Hitler’s remains were preserved as Nazi space scientists worked tirelessly to create technology which could be used to revive him. Both the US Government and the Soviets knew about the Nazi moon base, which is why there was such a large jump in space research and technology, because the Soviets and the Americans were secretly allied and attempting to destroy the Nazis on the moon. The cold war was actually a front for this, because as terrifying as the prospect of two major nuclear superpowers in a mutually-assured destruction standoff is Nazis on the moon are far more terrifying. So the arms race allowed both sides to build up nuclear weaponry to be used against the Nazis and the space race garnered American and Russian support for funding vast leaps in space exploration technology. By the 1960s, the first moon landing had taken place and there erupted a series of battles on the moon between American and Nazi forces. Unfortunately, the Americans were beaten back by the heavily-fortified Nazi fortress on the moon and to this day, the Nazis continue their research unhindered. At any moment, the Nazis may find a way to revive Hitler and return to power to conquer the world. Obviously this is the single greatest threat to my health and safety as I could be shot by Strösstruppen with laser guns at any point during the Space Nazi invasion, and failing that, having my entire curriculum rewritten in German would certainly hinder my academic success, because ich nicht sprechen sie Deutsch or whatever.

[Anlysia Gregoire]

You're retarded, Zrazor.

I love you. :inlove:

[Desereck Creeggan]

Turn it in.

Do it.

*waits for Zrazor to get a 0/100*

[RazorFox]

I'm gonna turn it in.

I think one of these days, if I can get up the nerve to do it, I'm gonna write the next Planes, Trains, and Plantains: The Story of Oedipus and turn it in.

[Trinity Heckroth]

Dont forget NASA's bombing of the moon. Obvious attack was obvious. Though, if they can survive interplanetary bombardment, I suggest we start brushing up on our german.

[RazorFox]

15/15 points.

[Desereck Creeggan]

LOL.

[Trinity Heckroth]

GJ, Z man.

[Tiridates Mikadze]

Outstanding, but I am afraid zat zee Fuhrer vill not allow you to varn zee verld about zee invasion. Guttennacht, Herr Rozenstrauch.

[RazorFox]

Outstanding, but I am afraid zat zee Fuhrer vill not allow you to varn zee verld about zee invasion. Guttennacht, Herr Rozenstrauch.

*opens the Ark of the Covenant*