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Memories memories. Hello again Ordo, I remember you all quite fondly but it has been a long enough while for you to have perhaps forgotten me. I still cherish the memories I still have, and I feel I owe you all an explanation for my disappearance. For those of you who don't know me, I have been a proud member of Ordo since June 2008. I achieved the rank of O-3 and served a tenure in Astra as well as Terra before the below events transpired. During the summer of 2011 my enthusiasm for Ordo and online gaming in general began to waiver. Second Life and other MMORPGs did not capture my attention as they used to. Late 2011 I was struck with a bout of depression I could not overcome. Being on the internet constantly, and working a job which only allows drinking; I began to experiment with bath salts or synthetic drugs. At home, my computer's network card took a shitter effectively ending my online gaming in November. My home and work life took unimaginable turns for the worst. My normally strong psyche turned into an addicted fiend. Life seemed more sober on the drugs than off, and that was the scariest realization of my life. I was fired early 2012 and lost my home that summer. I spent the summer months living in my car which was in itself a form of rehabilitation. The only thing that kept me going was my relationship. Fall 2012 passed and I had obtained a new job and my relationship fell apart, but I was off the streets just in time for winter. Now that the summer of 2013 is upon me, I find it hard to ignore the nostalgia I get when I think of the past. My free time is occupied by sleeping, eating, and doing nothing. It has now been over a year since I've touched anything other than tobacco, alcohol, and marijuana (Thank you Colorado!) and I can feel the old me returning. Inside nothing wants more than to plug in my computer and log into SL, but I still have some work to do before I'm ready. Currently, I only own the tower, the rest having been lost or sold long ago. The only internet connection I have is my windows phone which sucks in regards to gaming. I'm not sure where the road I'm on is leading me, but I know it is to a better place than I have been struggling with for the past two years. I'm trying my best to return to the friends and family I once had here, but money is tight and time even more so. You are all still in my mind and heart so I hope that enough hope will lead me back. I'm sure many of the voices and faces I remember are gone, but I know those that fill their spots are just as enjoyable to meet and get to know. Like a phoenix that has burned itself out, rises again from its ashes. My best wishes are with you all and I wish to see you all soon, Des