Tiridates Mikadze

I can have a team of Grey Knights and 4 regiments of Ordo Malleus Stormtroopers ready to go in an hour. We will burn everything to the ground and then bombard their tainted planet till we expose it's core to the cold of space.

Mien Lampf: the story of the light in the parlor, it's purchase, use, and the struggle of finding the right size three-setting lightbulb to replace the old one when it burns out. I mean seriously, $6 freaking bucks for this thing? Screw this, I'm getting a fluorescent, so I don't have to change it every month.

I've been stabbed 5 times, hit with a machete once, a baseball bat three times, and random sticks, pipes, and other blunt instruments so many times *I speak with a slur and my hands shake when I get excited*. Last week of High School (Sophomore year), I fought the entire male population of my gym class. I was the only one to get suspended out of nine other participants. I use to sell surveillance equipment and "personal defense" weapons among other curiosities. It was the best job ever. I have met the following people: Rosa Parks; Mr. Rogers (was a Presbyterian minister, was a really nice guy, too.); and Mahatma Ghandi's grandchildren. *This isn't true, I just have scars and my knee lets me know when the weather changes.

Dark looks so scary when you can absent-mindedly waltz into his Main Group and wreak havoc with little more than a yawn. Seriously, how can anyone consider him a sufficiently competent leader to even join his military at this point? Oh, wait. They don't anymore.

As you all know, Vegna Fouroux has been poking about for information, any information, on the Frumentarii. This was met with stonewalling and redirection at every turn. However, in his desperation, he turned to other sources, and he happened across one who has provided a series of documents woven with fabrication, to the intrepid would-be journalist. It must be said that we are saddened by the choices made by some of our former comrades in arms, as our compassion has been met with slander and defamation. Be that as it may, the misinformation must be addressed in no uncertain terms, and so to preempt any further efforts disinformation, the Frumentarii has prepared for you the documents and their context, absent of the skew and fabrications imbued to them by Dagger. ++++++++++ EXHIBIT A: ++++++++++ TITLED: Trevor's Secret List CONTENTS: To be reccommended for Expulsion/Demotion: Black Listed: Collinw Dagger On Notice: Poon Voom Robert Saintlouis Tig Spijkers Aelus Janus Khai Oto Cube Amat Alucard Thorne Ward Hudson To be Removed: Renukun Hax Commendable: Xoza Tyron Kitsukie Flare To be reccomended for merit/promotion: +++++++ This is a document from when Trevor Russell was still in the Mercz under his capacity as the Blade of Proteus. (lol) Two years ago. Its relevance is precisely zero. ++++++++++ EXHIBIT B: ++++++++++ TITLED: Vegna/Philip/Heather/Tuomy Log (Extended.) CONTENTS: [2008/10/29 12:34] Vegna Fouroux: well an ordo person shot me and apparently half the checkpoint yesterday so he kind of owed me [2008/10/29 12:35] Jayce Iredell: rofl [2008/10/29 12:35] Jayce Iredell: Thats the story that is floating around thanks to Takkun. -- Instant message logging enabled -- [12:44] Vegna Fouroux: um the bit about her shooting me is true [12:44] Vegna Fouroux: killing the cp im not sure [12:44] Vegna Fouroux: she very well might have [12:44] Jayce Iredell: You were there and you don't even know? [12:44] Vegna Fouroux: I died then went afk [12:45] Vegna Fouroux: so she might have continued her bloody rampage [12:45] Vegna Fouroux: that's what takkuns calling it [12:45] Vegna Fouroux: lol [12:45] Jayce Iredell: And you believe him? [12:45] Vegna Fouroux: hell yeah [12:45] Vegna Fouroux: it's takkun [12:45] Vegna Fouroux: he doesn't lie [12:46] Vegna Fouroux: he's an officer merczateer too [12:46] Vegna Fouroux: he knows not to stir drama unless it's true [12:46] Jayce Iredell: He will consort with Vanguard if it means hurting the Ordo. [12:46] Vegna Fouroux: hmm [12:46] Vegna Fouroux: well [12:46] Vegna Fouroux: he's no friend of ordo anyway [12:47] Jayce Iredell: I know. [12:47] Jayce Iredell: There is little or nothing I can do about it. [12:47] Jayce Iredell: I just have a headache over it. [13:10] Jayce Iredell: I cna prove Takkun did lie. [13:10] Vegna Fouroux: how? [13:10] Jayce Iredell: In his notice he says Nivanglus is ordo HC [13:11] Vegna Fouroux: how did you know that? [13:11] Jayce Iredell: Ordo HC is very limited, only O-3 officers and a select few Praetorian. [13:11] Jayce Iredell: Niv is W-1 [13:11] Jayce Iredell: Not even a commisioned officer. [13:12] Jayce Iredell: Think about that for a bit, I'm finished speaking about this for awhile, has me steamed. [13:13] Vegna Fouroux: well he made a mistake we can't all be familar with ordo ranks [13:13] Vegna Fouroux: I mean our high command is made up of experts some of whom are senior NCOs [13:13] Vegna Fouroux: not just officers [13:14] Jayce Iredell: Administration is not limited to officers, it includes praetorians and warrant grade officers, but there are only a few real commisioned officers in our group. [13:14] Vegna Fouroux: R U ONE OF DESE SELECT FEW? [13:15] Jayce Iredell: No I lost my commision for an event that occured a few months ago. [13:15] Vegna Fouroux: OUCH [12:22] Jayce Iredell: Katsuhito has had a good career till recently. [12:23] Phillip Hultcrantz: So I've noticed. Unfortunatly my first impression of him was his "I'm in command of the mercz" comment that made it into Christophs hands via Takkun. [12:23] Phillip Hultcrantz: Kas was demoted by Aryte for that one. [12:23] Jayce Iredell: I thought Takkun hates Vanguard. [12:23] Jayce Iredell: Why would he share that with them? [12:23] Phillip Hultcrantz: He does. But he'll do anything to make Ordo look bad. [12:24] Jayce Iredell: Takkun.... [12:24] Phillip Hultcrantz: Yes yes. [12:24] Phillip Hultcrantz: I know. [12:24] Jayce Iredell: Thats one person Frumentarii should be all over. [12:24] Phillip Hultcrantz: I would be surprised if they weren't. [12:25] Jayce Iredell: I'll have to poke around... [12:26] Jayce Iredell: If he is a threat to the Ordo. [12:26] Jayce Iredell: I mean does that not make him an enemy? [12:29] Phillip Hultcrantz: That's somthing that has to be taken up with Aryte. Takkun is now beyond my controle as I'm not a ranking officer of an allied military anymore. [12:33] Jayce Iredell: Mhm [12:37] Jayce Iredell: I'm going to pay a visit to the collective. [12:37] Phillip Hultcrantz: Alright., [12:37] Jayce Iredell: And yeah, since Takkun reported it as Nivanglus attacking, now it pretty much looks like we're at war. [12:38] Phillip Hultcrantz: That's all been sorted out. [12:38] Jayce Iredell: the SR is going to eat that like sugar sticks. [12:38] Jayce Iredell: [12:34] Vegna Fouroux: well an ordo person shot me and apparently half the checkpoint yesterday so he kind of owed me [12:39] Phillip Hultcrantz: No, all been sorted out. [12:41] Jayce Iredell: So even Vegna thinks Niv shot up the entire checkpoint. [12:41] Phillip Hultcrantz: Dosn't matter. The problem has been worked out. [12:42] Phillip Hultcrantz: There's always goign to be a handfull of grunts who will deny the truth. [12:42] Jayce Iredell: Thats not my concern, it is Takkun, he is kommisariat now, which means the higher he goes up the CoC, the more influence he will wield. [12:43] Phillip Hultcrantz: He's been in the Komm for months now. Don't worry so much about him. The more eye's he see's on him the worse he acts out. [12:48] Heather McKay: You're very quiet, are you OK Justin? [12:49] Jayce Iredell: No. [12:49] Jayce Iredell: I want to murder Takkun and use his entrails for christmas ornaments. [12:49] Heather McKay arches a brow at him. [12:50] Jayce Iredell: I have been in the ordo for two years and never in my time there have I encountered anyone as arrogant and short sighted as he is. [12:50] Heather McKay: If you want to be angry at anyone, be angry at me, because I started the whole mess, as I was going to Titan to sort things out. [12:51] Jayce Iredell: Takkun sent the notice. [12:51] Jayce Iredell: And VG and everyone else are probably hanging on it. [12:51] Jayce Iredell: Takkun is a seriously threat to the stability of the Iron symphony. [12:53] Heather McKay: Justin, these things bother you because you let them, and I'd suggest you cool it until you hear the entire story. [12:54] Jayce Iredell: The entire story is, and I know this, what Niv did was an accident, b ut because of poor communication, a farce of an investigation, and a vendetta by one of your officers to smear the Ordo, it has become a PR shit storm. [12:56] Jayce Iredell sighs heavily. [12:56] Jayce Iredell: I'm sorry. [12:57] Heather McKay: You feel better now? [12:57] Jayce Iredell: Not for that no. [12:57] Jayce Iredell: I did get it off my chest. [12:58] Heather McKay: Um-hmm. [12:58] Jayce Iredell: I do not want to make myself comforted at the cost of others, especially my friends. [12:59] Jayce Iredell: I do not wish to perpetuate this any farther. [13:00] Jayce Iredell: Heather? [13:03] Heather McKay: Why do you think I persued the matter? Vegna is a friend, as well as one of "my grunts" as I consider him, that protective side comes out. [13:03] Jayce Iredell: According to Vegna, Nivanglus shot up the CP, just to kill him, which we both know is false. [13:05] Jayce Iredell: [12:44] Jayce Iredell: You were there and you don't even know? [12:44] Vegna Fouroux: I died then went afk [12:45] Vegna Fouroux: so she might have continued her bloody rampage [12:45] Vegna Fouroux: that's what takkuns calling it [12:45] Vegna Fouroux: lol [12:45] Jayce Iredell: And you believe him? [12:45] Vegna Fouroux: hell yeah [12:45] Vegna Fouroux: it's takkun [12:45] Vegna Fouroux: he doesn't lie [12:46] Vegna Fouroux: he's an officer merczateer too [12:46] Vegna Fouroux: he knows not to stir drama unless it's true [12:46] Jayce Iredell: He will consort with Vanguard if it means hurting the Ordo. [12:46] Vegna Fouroux: hmm [12:46] Vegna Fouroux: well [12:46] Vegna Fouroux: he's no friend of ordo anyway [13:07] Heather McKay: Justin, digging into this again... [13:07] Jayce Iredell: I'm sorry. [13:14] Heather McKay: I have spoken to Aryte, as for Takkun, still trying to figure out what Nivanglus has done beside this. I know that he has not been the most pleasant of individuals to me, he's OK, I guess. [13:15] Jayce Iredell: Nivanglus reported himself to Aryte/ [13:15] Jayce Iredell: According to Aryte, the Mercz never filed a complaint. [13:16] Jayce Iredell: And no other reports have been made about Nivanglus by anyone in our group or yours. So basically this is a first time occurence. [13:17] Jayce Iredell: Takkun stretches the truth, he HATES the ordo, he conspires with PSC and VG. [13:17] Jayce Iredell: We know this. [13:18] Heather McKay: He doesn't hate Ordo as a whole, Justin, what he hates is the mindset at times, which I have to say, you're being rather frustrating at the moment. [13:19] Jayce Iredell: What becaus eI am being objective about it and not turning on someone who I consider a brother? [13:19] Jayce Iredell sighs deeply. [13:21] Jayce Iredell: Sorry. [12:37] Tuomy Boa: i am [12:37] Tuomy Boa: was afk [12:39] Jayce Iredell: port me? [12:42] Tuomy Boa: heard about latest takkun drama? [12:43] Tuomy Boa: i wonder when lurdan gets tired of cleaning takkuns messes [12:43] Jayce Iredell: Would you mind filling me in on what you have heard? [12:43] Tuomy Boa: Ordo Administratum (High Command) and Warrant Officer Nivanglus Aya has been banned for repeated harassment, and now the attacking of Mercz. Enlisted. Labeling allies as heretics and killing them in our own sim, none the less, will not be tolerated. Do not remove the ban. - Leyten

He ate my kittens and beat my mother.

It's the Throne Room. If you see two or more people in there, especially if one of them is Aryte, don't lurk around. If they're talking, move away. Go to another floor, find something else to do. Don't make me neuralize your memories.

I would like to thank all the heretics. You keep me warm at night. As fuel.

Seriously, it reads like a who's who of stupid and heresy.

Of course you don't like Kilts. You're Italian.

If you're willing to tangle with the US government and the State Department in particular, then you are a braver man than I. I salute you.

A more pitiful collection of rejects, malcontents, recidivists and traitors is not to be found. The only thing they shall find from me, my Lord, is the Purity of Fire and the Judgement of the Sword.

I would personally scrawl across it in big, official, red letters "JERK FACE JERK FACE JERK FACE". <3

That's why we never used it. I was like "I'M GOING TO WRITE THE BEST DAMN DOSSIER FORM EVER!" and then when I was done and had shown it to Aryte I took a look and was like "....oh god, no way. We can't do this to our own people.". We've never used it, and we never will. We've since decided that keeping files of any sort that resemble dossiers would invite too much of a chance for someone to abuse them, and so we don't keep anything of the sort. We're here to protect the Ordo from threats, not become one ourselves.

Director of Development, or I can do a certain amount of public affairs, if you like. Just lemme know.

I move that this be given to Curia/Aryte (via praetorian enforcement?) with ratification provided by the Munitorium Council.

Christoph has once again failed to take into account the nature of the internet. Not only is he clearly mistaken about the funds of the Ordo Imperialis, but he's wrong in thinking that Aryte-based erotica will tarnish his image. Given the furry nature of the SL military scene, it will probably increase your popularity. Also, leave it to Christoph to think that heterosexual intercourse is absolutely deviant, sick, and just plain wrong.

Understood, sir.

If he touches me, and I turn pink, can I bathe myself and him in holy cleansing flame :D?

...Feet.

This, coming from a HERETIC, BURN IT, BUUUUURN IT!

*falls to knees in the middle of a rainy street at night* NOOOOOOOOOOO WHY WHY?!

It is with regret that I report that effective immediately, the Frumentarii Externus will be disolved, and any remainder absorbed into the Frumentarii Internus. The reason for this is that with the decay of our greatest opponets, there is less a need for the infilitration of external organizations than at any time before. Coupled with the fact that the Externus has also been subjected to unwanted public scrutiny, it has been deemed prudent that we dissolve their operations, and focus instead on internal issues of counter-intelligence.

Over your rotting, maggot infested, desiccated corpse.

[21:54] Aryte Vesperia: If I was born in Russia, I'd scare myself. [21:54] Aryte Vesperia: FOR THE MOTHERLAND [21:54] Aryte Vesperia: RAR [21:55] Tiridates Mikadze: minus Stalin [21:55] Tiridates Mikadze: srsly, that guy was an asshole [21:56] Aryte Vesperia: I WOULD DEPOSE HIM [21:56] Aryte Vesperia: AH MOTHERLAND [21:57] Aryte Vesperia: I would make an amazing communist. [21:57] Aryte Vesperia: JUST YOU WAIT [21:57] Tiridates Mikadze: Quoted